How to achieve work-life balance? Wait, do you even believe that it is possible? After all, you have a lot of benefits at work, you take care of physical activity, diet, apps on your phone to increase work efficiency, you plan holidays, time for family, you try not to bring work home… But for some reason you wouldn’t call it balance. You can check off tasks on the “achieve work-life balance” list and not feel it inside. I suggest leaving a list, benefits and resolutions. When you come home or when you leave for work in the morning, do one short exercise. You will discover what balance is.
The fight for balance
Tiredness accompanies us every day. Then our nerves give way, we lack patience. We fight for peace and as a result there is no peace – what remains is fighting, anxiety and anger. Usually the people closest to us get hit- at home family, at work team or colleague sitting next to us. Work-life balance is not possible when you are rushing. Even though you give yourself the impression that you are slowing down, because after all, you go to the gym during your break at work, you put a plant on your desk, you have dinner with your family at home (of course, you did some shopping on the way and cooked this dinner), you take your children to training, while waiting you read or finish your work so that you don’t have to do it in the evening. You try so hard, but somehow no one notices. And all you can see is the mess, the unwashed dishes, the shouting, the stress before tomorrow’s presentation. Finally… you collapse.
I have discovered that often, despite our best efforts, we lack this balance, we don’t feel it. I have also discovered that mindful transitions are very helpful in bringing it back. Mindful transition is about consciously starting work and returning home.
Awareness of emotions
How many times have you come to work with tension that suddenly explodes when a colleague asks you to explain something that you thought was obvious? Or come home with your head full of thoughts about winning a tender and are met with a cold welcome from a partner who spent the whole day fighting a breakdown at work?
Our lives are full of emotions that accompany us from the moment we wake up in the morning to evening conversations over dinner. However, we often move from one situation to another without a moment’s reflection, and our moods wander with us – although we don’t always want it to.
Mindful transition is a simple practice that helps us stop for a moment and consciously notice what is happening inside us here and now. Thanks to this, you can see that your morning frustration is not the result of others’ actions, but the consequence of a difficult start to the day – for example, trying to explain to your child why they can’t take their favorite teddy bear to school when you were rushing to catch the bus. With such awareness, it is easier to distinguish your own emotions from the situation at work and understand that it was not your colleague’s request that caused your irritation.
Mindful transition is also useful in your private life. You can return home happy about the success you managed to achieve in the office, and at the same time notice that your partner needs support after a day full of difficult conversations with clients. Being aware of your emotions allows you to respond better to your own and others’ needs and avoid misunderstandings.
Mindful moment
Such a moment of reflection between one stage of the day and another does not require much time. Just a few deep breaths, a few questions asked to yourself: What am I feeling now? What happened that made me feel this way? That’s all – and the difference in relationships and how you experience the day can be huge.
To make these transitions easier for you, I have prepared a short mindful breathing meditation (6 min). It consists of 3 parts: noticing thoughts, emotions and sensations from the body, mindful breathing and returning your attention to the surroundings and your own body. Each part of the prepared meditation lasts about 2 minutes. However, you can do it on your own and shorten or lengthen it as you wish, depending on the time and needs. Just try to keep the proportions of all 3 parts the same. Stop in this mindful way when you enter work or home. See how your sense of balance changes after a month, after 2 and after 3.
Harmony begins with small steps. From the moment you stop, look at yourself mindfully and consciously decide how you want to enter a new space – at work, at home or in relationships with loved ones.
