Blog
Conflict is often similar to a situation in which you lose control of your car. Your movements become chaotic, you jerk the steering wheel to get the car back on track, you press the gas or brake pedal (not necessarily the right one), you panic. And that only makes the situation worse. So let's get back to taking control.
Until recently, I was convinced that cooperation is the best way to resolve conflicts. Always. Without exception. This belief has accompanied me for years, reinforced by books, trainings and work methodologies or frameworks. Especially in a work environment based on Agile, where cooperation is a paramount value and is inflected in all cases. No wonder - after all, cooperation gives the best results.
As a leader, it is easy to fall into the trap of immediately providing solutions. We are used to the idea that we are supposed to “know the way” and show the direction. But true leadership often begins not with talking – but with listening. And the best way to listen and understand is to ask questions.
An assertive leader is not only able to say "no", but also is aware of their own values, is open to constructive criticism and cares about authentic communication. A leader who can be assertive manages the team more effectively and also inspires them to better cooperation and independence.
I have discovered that often, despite our best efforts, we lack this balance, we don't feel it. I have also discovered that mindful transitions are very helpful in bringing it back. Mindful transition is a conscious start to work and returning home.
In many companies, conflict is often treated as something that should be avoided at all costs. Leaders, managers, and employees alike shy away from addressing difficult issues head-on, sometimes even going as far as to deny that a conflict exists. But why is this the case, and what impact does this avoidance have on the organization and its people?