Recently, I’ve been hooked on the series “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel”. It’s been a long time since any series attracted me so much that I stayed with it for 5 seasons… I prefer mini-series: they have a story and I know that it will last, for example, 8 episodes and I will be able to come back to life 😉 Ok, but why did it attract me so much?
The series brilliantly shows interpersonal relationships, exaggerating our habitual behaviors, fears and desires. The title character, Midge Maisel, discovers that she has a talent for comedy and wants to perform on stage as a comedian. It’s the 1960s, New York, moral, political and religious correctness is very important. Conventions are present at every step.
Within these boundaries imposed by culture, religion (the characters are Jews), and tradition, everyone finds their own way to express themselves and not harm others. It doesn’t always work out.
Midge’s parents avoid confrontation and difficult situations by using a “cover story” strategy. This tactic involves inventing little lies to avoid stress and the need to explain unusual solutions or behavior. They often do a lot “for show” to keep up appearances in front of others. A “great” defense mechanism is created to avoid judgment and conflict. This is very amusingly illustrated by the dialogue between the main character and her father:
– Stop arguing!
-Who’s arguing? We are recalibrating our relationship.
Midge Maisel, on the other hand, cannot be honest in her personal relationships, but she is painfully honest on stage as a stand-up comedian. Unfortunately, when friends show up in the audience, this honesty can hurt, which shows how difficult it is to be authentic with people close to you.
Finally, the relationship between Midge and her ex-husband, Joel, shows us that even when two people seem compatible, they can have difficulty communicating and broaching difficult topics. Midge and Joel take turns caring for the children, helping each other when needed, even saving each other from trouble. However, they cannot analyze their problems in depth. Avoiding uncomfortable conversations is another defense mechanism that hinders relationship development.
While watching the series and observing the relationships between the characters, it is worth considering your own relationships. What defense mechanisms do we use? Do we avoid difficult conversations? What are our strategies for dealing with conflicts in relationships with family, friends or partners? What are our own “cover stories”? And most importantly – can we show ourselves as we really are, especially in front of our closest people?
